CREATION.sh

In the beginning there was the terminal. And God said

God's Mac:~ god$sudo -s Let there be light!

Password: Omnipotent

Sorry, try again.

Password: omnipotent

Sorry, try again.

Password: Technocrat

And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Sunday, March 1.

bash-3.2#Let there be light!

bash: Let there be light!: command not found

bash-3.2#touch light

bash-3.2#open heaven and earth

And God created Day and Night. And God saw there were 0 errors.

And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Sunday, March 1.

And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Monday, March 2.

bash-3.2#Let there be firmament in the midst of water and light

bash: Let there be firmament in the midst of water and light: command not found

bash-3.2#touch firmament

bash-3.2#open firmament

And God divided the waters. And God saw there were 0 errors.

And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Monday, March 2.

And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Tuesday, March 3.

bash-3.2#Let the waters under heaven be gathered together unto one place
and let the dry land appear and

bash: Let the waters under heaven be gathered together unto one place
and let the dry land appear and: command not found

bash-3.2#touch dry_land

bash-3.2#open firmament

And God divided the waters. And God saw there were 0 errors.

And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Tuesday, March 3.

And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Wednesday, March 4.

bash-3.2#defaults write com.apple.lights lights in the firmament to divide the day from the night

Unspecified args

bash-3.2#defaults write com.apple.lights lights=2/day

bash-3.2#touch sun_moon_stars

bash-3.2#open sun_moon_stars

And God divided the waters. And God saw there were 0 errors.

And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Wednesday, March 4.

And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Thursday, March 5.

bash-3.2#touch fish

bash-3.2#touch fowl

bash-3.2#open fish|fowl

And God created the great sea monsters and every living creature
that creepeth wherewith the waters swarmed after its kind and every
winged fowl after its kind. And God saw there were 0 errors.

And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Thursday, March 5.

And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Friday, March 6.

bash-3.2#touch cattle

bash-3.2#touch creepy_things

bash-3.2#Now let us make man in our image

bash: Now let us make man in our image: command not found

bash-3.2#touch man

bash-3.2#Be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth and subdue it and
have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the fowl of the air and
over every living thing that creepeth upon the earth

bash: Be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth and subdue it and
have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the fowl of the air and
over every living thing that creepeth upon the earth : command not found

bash-3.2#open multiplication

process 'multiplication' quite unexpectedly. 6 errors

bash-3.2#defaults write com.apple.man add=breath

bash-3.2#open multiplication

process 'multiplication' quite unexpectedly. 5 errors

bash-3.2#mkdir ~/Garden\ of\ Eden/

bash-3.2#mv man ~/Garden\ of\ Eden/

bash-3.2#open multiplication

process 'multiplication' quite unexpectedly. 3 errors

bash-3.2#cp ~/Garden\ of\ Eden/man ~/Garden\ of\ Eden/woman

bash-3.2#open multiplication

process 'multiplication' quite unexpectedly. 2 errors

bash-3.2#defaults write com.apple.man add=desire

bash-3.2#open multiplication

And God saw man and woman being fruitful and multiplying in ~/Garden of Eden/

Warning: No time limit on this process. 1 errors.

bash-3.2#defaults write com.apple.man add=freewill

bash-3.2#open multiplication

And God saw man and woman being fruitful and multiplying in ~/Garden of Eden/

Warning: No time limit on this run. 1 errors.

bash-3.2#Undo desire

Desire cannot be undone once freewill is enabled.

bash-3.2#rm freewill

Freewill is an inaccessible file and cannot be removed.

Enter replacement, cancel, or ask for man.

bash-3.2#man desire

Desire cannot be undone once freewill is created.

Freewill is an inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed.

Enter replacement, cancel, or ask for man.

bash-3.2#touch tree_of_knowledge

And God saw man and woman being fruitful and multiplying in
~/Garden of Eden/

Warning: No time limit on this run. 1 errors.

bash-3.2#touch good, evil

bash-3.2#open evil

And God saw he had created shame.

Warning system error in sector E95. Man and woman not in ~/Garden of Eden/ :1
errors.

bash-3.2#spotlight ~/Garden of Eden/ man|woman

no results found

bash-3.2#rm shame

Shame cannot be deleted once evil has been activated.

bash-3.2#rm freewill

Freewill is an inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed.

Enter replacement, cancel, or ask for man.

bash-3.2#killall

At least one option or argument to specify processes must be given.

bash-3.2#exit

exit

God's Mac:~ god$exit

God's Mac:~ god$exit

ATTENTION ALL USERS *** ATTENTION ALL USERS: CPU HAULTED FOR
REGULAR DAY OF MAINTENANCE AND REST IN FIVE MINUTES.

bash-3.2#touch new world

You have exceeded your allocated file space. You must destroy old files
before new ones can be created.

bash-3.2#rm earth

Destroy earth: confirm: r-w-r--rw overide:y/n

y

COMPUTER DOWN *** COMPUTER DOWN. SERVICES WILL RESUME SUNDAY, MARCH 8 AT
6:00 AM. YOU MUST SIGN OFF NOW.

And God logged off at 11:59:59 PM, Friday, March 6.




(Written by fellow CPU jockey Miller Montz)